Letter to Giuliana, Big-Sister-To-Be

Dear Sweet Giuliana,

Oh, my sweet first born baby.  You have no idea the joy you have brought Daddy and I over the last year and a half.  You have been an absolute joy wrapped in the biggest learning experience of our lives.   You have gone from a tiny, helpless little baby to a walking, talking, laughing and exploring toddler.  Now, as we anticipate the arrival of your baby sister, we look forward to adding "Big Sister" to all those wonderful things you've become.

You have been our first experience with being parents.  It's been heartbreaking at times and pure joy the rest of the time.  I never knew how much the saying "Having a child is a momentous decision.  It's the decision to have your heart forever go walking around outside your body" was true until I brought you into the world.  You are, by far, the most amazing thing that Daddy and I have ever done and everything you've done both big and small has made us beam with pride.  You are beautiful, gentle and sweet...the quintessential little girl.  You're cautious and shy at first and then boisterous and fun-loving next.  I cannot wait to watch you with your little sister.  I just know you're going to be so full of wonder and protective curiosity when it comes to her.  Daddy and I are so blessed.

You've had a really big year and a half of life, sweet girl.  You've lived in three houses in the short time you've been here and now we're finally in the home where you will grow up and I think you are just as pleased as we are to be here and settled.  You have handled the transitions of it all so well and we are so surprised at your resilience.  You love your friends at school, your dog and kitty and being pushed around in all your cool car toys.  You will get to share all of these fun things with your sister when she gets here and is old enough to enjoy them.  It will be up to you to show her so many things and I just know it's going to make you the very best of friends.

Mama has struggled with the question of whether it's possible to love two children the way you have loved just one.  Will there be enough love to go around and can I possibly love anything else the way I love you?  It's a tough one.  You are my heart, baby girl and I can't imagine love twice that big.  I know it will happen and it will be natural once your sister is here, but it's hard to fathom. You have such a special place with both Daddy and with me.  That special place will always be there, as you will always be our first born child.  I think that God giving us two babies to love and doubling the love in our hearts to make room for two makes us so, so lucky.  Sharing is what life is about and what better way to show you that than giving you this gift of a sister?

I know that for a little while you may become a bit of a Daddy's girl after Libby is born and that's okay.  I know that my hands will seem very busy with the new baby and less available to help you with the things you still need from me.  I promise to try very hard to take the time to still hold your hand, hug you, help you with your bath and your dinner and read you bedtime stories, even when Libby may seem to need me more.  My hands will always still belong to both of you, as will my heart.  Please don't forget that, honey.  Mama may be busy, but she's never too busy with one to be there for the other.

Thank you for letting me learn how to be a mother these last 18 months.  Without you, I'd not know what in the world to do with this new baby.  You are so special and so loved, Baby G.  We are such lucky parents to have you as our first born and Libby is the luckiest little sister in the world to have you to look up to as she grows up.  We love you to the moon and back.

Love always,

Mama